1. Watch the opening sequence of “Contact” where you pull back from Earth and you hear all the different radio signals that we’ve sent out over the years and there’s all these different serious news bulletins and JFK speeches and stuff, and then you hear Dean Martin’s “Volare” and you smile thinkin’ about Dino flyin’ through space with like a cocktail in his hand!
2. Spend an extra three minutes on the can squeezing out that extra little bit of shit that will make or break your day.
3. Take three Vicodin, wait a minute, then do three shots of vodka, wait a minute, then do three bong hits, wait thirty seconds, then spend the last thirty seconds turning on my Xbox and sitting in my beanbag chair to play Skyrim for 300 AMAZING minutes.